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Couples Therapy

 

My theoretical orientation has its foundation in both Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Systems Theory. Couples therapy is further influenced by Contextual CBT and Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT).

Couples therapy is different from individual therapy in that the relationship is the focus, rather than the individual. My umbrella strategy is to first help the relationship STABILIZE, then IMPROVE, and then THRIVE. During the course of this process, we will:

  • Build clarity and safety, in order to set the stage for open and transparent interactions
  • Increase awareness; and thus, increase intentional behavior, rather than reactive (and primitive) behavior
  • Return a sense of integrity by returning to values-driven decisions
  • Illuminate the contextual and systemic elements (i.e., the "big picture") that interact with the relationship
  • Reveal the true emotions that are underlying the interactions and cycle

This work can be done with our partners, family members, and friends and can not only help with our overall well being, but also helps us individually grow and reach our full potential. I believe that that journey toward wellness is supported by:

  • creating a balance between passion and peace
  • strengthening our integrity
  • living a life according to our values
  • growing our self-empowerment
  • moving forward with intention 
  • developing a sense of meaning

SESSIONS

The first two sessions should ideally happen within the first week with both members of the couple present, and the next two sessions should take place during the second week; these are individual sessions with both partners. From then on, weekly sessions will likely include both partners. Once the relationship has stabilized, we will discuss the possibility of decreasing session frequency. Couples therapy will include regular assessments in order to track change, and may also include hypnotherapy, which can help lower the defensive walls that many people have built. I may also ask your permission to sometimes video record sessions, in order to help us make sense of or illuminate complex situations.

I strongly believe that couples therapy should not exceed one year - couples can become overly reliant on their therapist and sometimes therapy is the only glue holding the relationship together! Couples therapy involves hard work, can challenge your fears, and can push your comfort levels. I expect couples to put in the needed effort and time outside of sessions. If it becomes clear that homework is not happening, we will discuss whether or not therapy with me is the best fit. Couples therapy can be wonderfully effective, but you should be prepared for a process that will likely be time intensive and emotionally tiring.

I promise to also put in the work, both in and out of session, to help the relationship attain its full potential with compassion, objective assessment, honesty, and moments of joy. I would be honored to facilitate this process with you.